Calabria - Italian

Calabria

Dining Category: Italian

Price: $$-$$$

Address: 132 Lake Street South (Kirkland)

Phone Number: 425-822-7350

Website: www.calabriakirkland.com

Overview:

Tucked away in a corner of a strip mall near the upscale section of Kirkland’s waterfront, Calabria is an Italian place that has outside seating and a lounge in addition to the central serving area.

Food:

B: Funny story-- before I met the wife, I would have said Italian was my least-favorite food to eat when going out. It’s usually crazy overpriced, the sauces are bland, and there’s way too much cheese on everything. (FYI: more cheese does not equal better taste.) However, she opened my eyes to what Italian food could taste like, and I’ve been a bigger fan ever since.

G: Yay me!

B: A definite yay for the wife, yes. Anyway, eating at Calabria reminded me of what I disliked about bad Italian in the first place.

G: I am so glad this was not the first Italian place we went to together, or I would probably have never convinced him to try Italian again. This place was awful.

We had a basket of cold bread brought to our table first. It’s just a pet peeve of mine, but if you’re going to bother bringing out bread would it kill you to just warm it up for a second? It seems to me it’s a pretty easy thing to do.

Insalata de bietole - spinach, lemon vinaigrette, candied walnuts, gorgonzola cheese, onions and beets

Then we had salad. The general idea of the salad is one we both enjoy; a vinaigrette with candied nuts and a sprinkle of cheese, so we were looking forward to it. Unfortunately, it did not deliver. There was waaaay too much cheese on top and the lemon vinaigrette, to me, just didn’t go with the rest of the flavors of the salad. It seemed completely out of place.

B: It wasn’t even a vinaigrette, it tasted like straight-up lemon juice to me. I’ve made better salads after cleaning out the fridge. In addition, the description mentioned beets, but there wasn’t a single one to be found on the plate. Hello?!?

Puttanesca - spaghetti with red sauce, anchovy, olives and capers

Moving on to my main dish, puttanesca is probably my favorite pasta presentation of all time, and I usually say that if

a restaurant can do that well, then the rest of their food is probably pretty good. Let’s just say that the rest of the food here probably isn’t pretty good. The sauce was thin, watery, and lacked any bite, the anchovy taste was too pronounced, and the capers tasted like they hadn’t even been simmering in the sauce. I mean, it might have satisfied the technical definition of what puttanesca is, but it certainly didn’t satisfy me.

Pollo alla Calabria - penne pasta with chicken in a gorgonzola cream sauce

G: My dish was also well below par. I don’t normally order dishes with cream sauces because they tend to be a little on the bland side for me and usually swim in sauce. I decided to give this one a shot though-- what can I say? I was in the mood.

I was incredibly disappointed.

For any of you that have read our blog up to this point, you might recall me making mention of the fact that biting into a piece of gristle in meat is an absolute dealbreaker for me. The very first bite I had of this dish was exactly that.

I considered pushing the plate away immediately after that, but since I knew I was going to be writing for all of you folks out there, I figured I needed to do more than one bite to do the review justice. (But it was hard, let me tell you.)

The subsequent bites did little more to impress me. The sauce was a gorgonzola cheese sauce, which the restaurant claims everyone loves. I am not everyone, I guess. I thought it was the wrong choice completely. The cheese had an aftertaste that was overpoweringly bitter, and the more bites I had, the worse it got. Plus, I felt the penne as a pasta choice was all wrong. Every bite was drowning in the cheese sauce caught up inside and outside of the pasta.

Service:

B: The waiter was attentive, but a little on the smarmy side. Considering we were the only people in the place at the time, I would have appreciated a little less attitude, but he met all the requirements and I don’t really have any significant complaints in this category. We got served.

Closing Comments:

B: Just the other day, I was mentioning to the wife that we hadn’t done a negative review in a while and that the blog shouldn’t go all pollyanna every week. It looks like my wish was granted, but the downside was that we actually had to pay money for bad food - not exactly one of my favorite things. There’s nothing else to say here. With all the great Italian to be had in Seattle, this place shouldn’t even be on your radar.

G: Not only will we never be going back there, I will absolutely not be recommending it to anyone I know. I have to admit to you all, I was embarrassed at how much we paid for this mediocre to pathetic meal. Please, for all that is good and holy, do not eat at this restaurant!

Rating:

1 out of 5 - We’re never coming back.